Booooooo oooo ooooooo
Well, it’s 11pm on the night before Halloween. Since I’ve been sicker than a dog for 3 days, I would really like to be sleeping? What am I doing instead? Sitting up watching the Suite Life of Zach and Cody on monster duty. 10 year olf Little Miss was invited to a friend’s halloween party tonight. On the invitation it said they were going to a terror trail. Silly me assumed they meant some silly, mildly scary, trail around their house in the woods. No. Not that at all.
Terror Trail is a super scary outdoor haunted trail thing, where grown people, well, sometimes need a change of clothes when they are done – not for 10 year olds on Friday nights. By the time I realized where they were actually going, it was too late for me to stop it really, and then I figured that hopefully the performers would maybe realize they had a group of young ones brought by someone who didn’t check the place out first and take it easy on them, maybe the mother would see the sign saying it was appropriate for kids over 13, or maybe my daughter would just protest so much she wouldn’t go in.
Nope, none of that happened. While little miss did protest, she was still encouraged to go. The actors didn’t let up. In fact, I’m a bit shocked at the amount of grabbing and not letting go of customers that went on. I don’t recall being held onto when I went years ago. Several perfomers got kicked by the kids, and that makes me a bit happy I must say – I just wish Little Miss woulda been the one kicking. So, she came home sobbing, who knows how long she had been sobbing, and she doesn’t want to sleep in her room…imagine that. So here I am, sitting up… with my only comfort being so are 7 other parents, including the one in charge……
I was “forced” to watch Nightmare on Elm Street by some friends when I was 9, and it freaked me out for YEARS… like 20 years… I can’t even imagine having to deal with the haunted house thing where the scary stuff was actually happening to you! Hopefully she copes well, I don’t recal reading this chapter in the What to Expect book…
Blah!
That is what today is – like the only time I’ve made potato soup. It was most positively the most uninspiring thing a person could eat other than paste back when they were in kindergarten. In fact, it may have really been paste disguised as soup now that I think about it.
Honestly, I hate the fall. Fall means winter is on it’s way, and if there is anything I hate more than fall, it is winter! I detest waking up to cold darkness. I hate cold rainy fall days. Everything is dying. It’s just flat out depressing. Pass me the happy pills please!
Have I brought you down yet? No? I can keep on trying…
But, I won’t. Let’s move on, shall we?
I’ve not been called to teach yet – which is probably part of my foul, blah, mood. Money to pay bills is nice. Not having your husband look at you like you’ve done a crazy, irresponsible thing when he gets home from work to discover you’ve been home all day yet again is nice. Okay – he doesn’t look at me like that (yet?) - it’s just my self imposed guilt factor that makes me think that. I mean, here I am lounging around the house in my PJ’s doing great things like cleaning and playing in my studio – and he hasn’t had a day off in over a month. How rude is that? Nevermind that the house is actually getting cleaned again, and he hasn’t had to cook dinner in 2 weeks, which hasn’t happened in years.
Oh sorry, did I slip back to that place again? ahem… moving on..
I’ve got 2 necklaces ready to photograph if the sun ever comes out again, oh sorry as soon as there is enough light. And if I do say so myself, I rather like them a lot. I will list them up on Etsy along with my other necklaces. I spent the morning running around town gathering supplies to make some stitch markers and other odds and ends as well. We’ll see how that goes next week. I’ll be sure to post pictures soon too.
Well, I must go – I need to figure out exactly how much I can stalk the sub. caller without making myself out to be a pain in the rumpus. I wish we had an automated system – I’d have no problem calling a phone number 6000 times a day!
Travel Where Your Heart Leads You
So, to justify having all this time on my hands as I sit and constantly stare down the phone patiently wait to be called to work, I told myself I would work for 4 hours in my studio on days I wasn’t working. I didn’t do it at all this week because:
- my studio was a mess and had to be cleaned first
- I kind of looked at this week as a week to get a head start on the house
- my studio was a mess
- my studio was a disaster
You get what I’m sayin!
So, I finally made it down today. I had picked up some dyed ribbon at WI Sheep and Wool from the Carriage House Woolens booth that was just gorgeous. (I could kick myself for not buying more colors because I only got 2 hanks and I don’t see it available on their website. I’ll have to inquire if they have more.) I choose the blue and green one to work with today, since I always go for red and black. (the other color I got of course!)
I looked around and found a vintage necklace that had beads that would compliment the ribbon, as well as a vintage clip on earing and started to get to work. I am using postage stamps along with the beads and ribbon. I visualize this necklace being worn as an independent, confidant, woman travels across the world in a train way back in time, with her big full dresses and trunks full of souvenirs from her travels. I think I’ll make a pair of earings to match.
And that is where I quite for today. My time was up, and I need to buy a new soldering iron before I can finish the postage stamp charms.
Everything is made by hand by myself, so it takes a long time to put one of these treasures together. Of course the photos aren’t so great because my studio is dark and in the dungeon, but I’ll be sure the final pictures do it justice.
The “new ‘do”
So, you know what the first thing you do when you dump your ex is, right? You cut your hair. That’s essentially what I’ve done with the blog, gone from long hair to a super short pixie cut!
I started the blog a few years ago when life was very, VERY different, some of you know why, so let’s just not revisit those days. Lately I’ve been wanting to post, but not sure what to post – life has been whipping me around like a dog with a dead fish busy . It’s like being me on the blog was always getting in my eyes, tangled up in ponytail holders, and clogging the drains – ewww. So, I’ve “cut it” short along with a few other things in my life.
See, I’ve spent the last few years making myself insanely busy. Too busy to do the things I believe a good mother and wife should do properly (you know, keep the floors from getting so sticky you can’t walk on them, or being home to help with homework every night) Maybe I’m making up for something I didn’t do as a child, maybe I’m really, really, bad at saying no, maybe I think I can do everything, or maybe, just maybe I want to be involved in my children’s lives a bit too much. But really, in the short time a child is your “child” is there such thing as too much? We all know it’s just a matter of 5 or 6 years before Little Ms. is screaming that she hates me and slamming doors in my face (or maybe she’ll take after me and never do those horrible things.. hah!) – so I best be a present driving force in her life now.
And then there is the matter of the other children in the “village”. See, lots of kids don’t have parents that can or want to be involved in their lives. Lots of kids don’t think they are worth much. Lots of kids don’t think they can do whatever they want if they just reach down deep enough. That breaks my heart.If I had a super power it would be that I could go up to every child and tell them they are a gift, they are perfect individuals, that they are strong and can be brave and to believe in themselves, (and they need to be nice to all the other children and encourage them as well) and have them fully believe me.
That’s the biggest reason I’ve stayed on as a Girl Scout leader – which takes up quite a bit of time, and because I’m an overachiever, more time for me than the average person. Sure I joined up for my own child, but then I realized how many other children out there need someone to touch their lives, even if it’s just for them to remember back one day and say, “hey, that leader lady, she always let me my own decisions and encouraged me” [One of my proudest moments is having a dad of a 10 year old tell me, after I returned his daughter’s pocket knife from an overnight camp session, “ya, I sent her with a dull one so she wouldn’t get hurt” and then me replying “well, she couldn’t do the activity very well because of it, and lesson number 4 in their training was that dull knives are dangerous – so I lent her my very, very sharp knife, she handled it just fine, and no one died – can you please show her how to sharpen this one?” (said with a smile of course).
And then there is the issue of the j.o.b. It was perfect one time when I was so drained mentally I needed all those non-thinking-required hours to let my brain gel back together. Lately, I’ve found it very, very boring, and really – I can’t STAND to be bored by force. It was also not a good fit for either me or my employer. They couldn’t challenge me, I couldn’t dumb myself down enough to meet their expectations and feel good about myself – not to mention the long hours and long drive, if only a few days a week.
So, I quit. I’ve been looking for the right job for a few years, and with Little Mr. in school every day now, this year was the perfect time. But, I wasn’t going to leave a company I liked, that paid well, was flexible, and contained all my friends for just any job. It had to be a job with no weekends, no evening hours, close to home, and somewhat flexible – as I still hold down one other part-time job. I was hoping the school secretary would retire, but she isn’t that old. I tried to get in as an aide, but the only way into the union without a teaching job is via the lunch lady line – which didn’t pay enough. Then, one day, in the only 4 sentences I’ve spoken with Little Ms.’s first grade teacher in 4 years, a new path was laid out before me. I was informed I had the needed requirements to be a substitute. Then, the school district actually advertised that they NEEDED subs! So that is where I am today. There is a lot of concern about the timing with this economy, and then recent news about Mr. CH’s job – but I have faith that this path couldn’t have been pointed out any clearer to me by the universe unless it shoved me down it hard, so it must be the path I am to follow.
So now I’m a knitting, metalsmithing, mother of 2, wife, secretary, girl scout leader, and waiting to be called for her first day substitute teacher praying she made the right decision!!!
But of course, the old me is not gone. I will be bringing most of the old posts back, but some of them aren’t relative anymore, and now that I have a much more “in the public life” some things don’t need to be out there since they no longer apply. It’s just gonna take a while to weed through 300+ posts!
REMODEL!
Guess what – the blog is under remodel – come back soon. (yes, some of the old stuff will be brought back )
